When I get however smarter, more aware, or however I “catch on” to what other people seemingly collectively know is really going on, They sometimes get scared, Since I’m out of my “character” they comfortably prefer,
I presently assume I accurately sense.. A lot of excessive distrust and fear that to me, Seems to make judgment less clear,
Based on how I presently see, With greater and greater means of torture and distruction, Such as constructing and designing more and more elaborate systems of weapons or means of harm for a greater and greater sense of personal or group protection, As the internal emotional defense reaction, Instead of accepting the discomforting emotion such as inhaling, consciously detaching while inwardly witnessing, untangeling.. To produce less resisting and more tolerance of the emotion that’s causing discomfort..
And instead of reducing means of destruction for ourselves to use to defend what we assume as a threat, I think we just create more means of harm and destruction we’ve always been afraid of?
Since to me, it seems, more social isolation puts us at greater vulnerability to make wrong assumptions about others such as fearing them excessively, And if we don’t know how to attain confidence to face our fear by interacting with others, I guess we’ll more likely cultivate more and more means of destruction all due to disproportionate fearful assumptions that unconsciously grew in us while in isolation..?
That’s at least part of my present conclusion for that emotional equation..
In other words, I guess I could say that, Less emotional awareness required for attaining, building and sustaining consistent increasing confidence, Puts us more at risk, To stay longer in our comfort zones, And therefore build more and more brutal resistance to leaving our comfort zones..? Such as me possibly not wanting to interact with others due to a fear of bullying, And therefore causing me to keep trying to create more and more intricate means of violently defending myself incase I’m forced to interact verbally, All because I still wouldn’t know how to properly develop, attain and maintain a needed level of confidence to know how to consistently safely defend myself physically, mentally and emotionally (for example) without weapons.. Whether that’s through honest peaceful energy.. or whatever that could be.. ?
To try to simplify it mathematically, I guess I could say,
Unawareness for proper peaceful survival cultivation,
Continually increasing isolation,
A greater chance of feeling a perpetual greater need for violent destruction ?
Another emotional math problem may look like.. Experiencing learning challenges creating more anxiety and less confidence, plus, Innate higher vulnerability to emotional intensity such as anxiety, producing excessive anxiety, plus, Sadness created in us (more vulnerable individuals) due to realizing more and more that others struggle far less at being less anxious and far more seemingly capable under equal circumstance, Plus, painful growing envy that we don’t know how to heal that instead builds and builds, Plus the out of control anger we receive from others who don’t know why we’re so anxious and “stupid”.. Causing more and more painful envy in the excessively anxious and learning challenged individual, May one day, equal, in those of us who are excessively anxious and learning challenged..? Out of control violent rage? Unless you added an unusually higher ability in the learning and anxious (or emotionally) challenged individuals to heal and improve themselves on an unusually higher level so they can speed up faster than a “typical” level so they can arrive (or possibly pass) those individuals functioning on a “typical” emotional and learning ability level?
Yeah I’d have to double check this since I don’t know if enough others will understand and feel me regarding this.. But maybe they do..? And maybe I assume they don’t since I have been spending too much time by myself and haven’t been practicing enough awareness to NOT feel a compulsive need to write this assuming enough others already clearly understand this..
As of now I assume I’ll always struggle to get out of my comfort zone when necessary, I always hope it’ll get easier, Partly so I become more aware so I don’t fear what I don’t need to fear,
I guess causes and effects of emotions can be understood as types of math problems and it seems there are lots of problems.. ?
Yep.. Pun.. intended,
And yes, The emotional math problems and/or equations may get infinitely more complicated and infinite new ways of learning and understanding may always be invariably clearly unraveling