Last Light

(Genre: Short fictional one part play..(?))

The one and only, Part 1:

Our story begins with three lost and confused individuals amidst a changing and overpopulating planet..

Jim: There’s no such thing as ghosts.
Alfred: Well what if I hallucinate one..?
Ron: I don’t know.., “what if!?”..
Alfred: How is getting mad going to teach me anything..?
Jim: It’ll teach you to stop thinking about yourself.
Alfred: What’s that supposed to mean..?
Ron: You’ll see.
Alfred: Oh you guys are assholes.

Alfred ends the video call.. then calls back again..

Ron: Let me guess.. you left the lights on..?
Alfred: Well where’s the fucking switch!?
Jim: It should be through the dark spiral staircase up to the sanctuary..
Alfred: Man fu—
Both Ron and Jim: Bahahahahah!!!

Alfred: What!!!?

Ron: Well, now you know how us electricians feel when you forget to pay us..?
Alfred: JUST REMIND ME!!!!
Jim: Oh man.. I can’t.. this is just.. wow..
Alfred: No.. this isn’t funny.. just stop..
Ron: Just man up..

Jim gets sarcastic then laughs at his own statement;

Jim: Hey man, you’re adding to his accumulated psychological “trauma”.. tahahaha!!
Alfred: Fuck.. yo—

Jim and Ron hang up and message each other;

Jim: Yo, wanna message him a picture of the exorcism of Carrie White..?
Ron: Okay, lmaoo

(For anyone who does not know, “lmaoo” is an abbreviation for “laughing my ass off” and the extra “o” is used for emphasis..(..?)),

(Source: (Apologies.. I’m not sure how to create footnotes and/or endnotes with WordPress.com).. “Lmaoo.” Urban Dictionary, 21 May 2009, http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=lmaoo. (https://www.calvin.edu/library/knightcite/index.php)),

They call Alfred back..

Jim: Have you found the switch yet baby boy..?

Alfred: No..

Jim and Ron: Bahahahaha!!!

Alfred: You guys..

Jim and Ron message each other after hanging up on Alfred.., and then they send him the picture..

Alfred: Ahhh!! Shit!! Shit!!

Alfred starts vandalizing the church while talking to himself..

Alfred: Assholes!! Fucking asshole fucks!! That’s it, I’m getting the fuck out of here!!

Alfred races to the door while leaving the last light on..

Alfred: Huh!! Huh!! Huh!!

Jim and Ron call Alfred back..

Alfred: Yo just stop!! I’ll fucking pay you.. just.. stop!!

Jim and Ron hang up and message each other..

Jim: Yeah maybe this is a little much..?

Ron: No, it’s what he deserves.

Jim: Dude.. I just don’t know!?

Ron: Trust me.

Jim: Whatever you say..

Ron and Jim decide to call Alfred back. Alfred answers his phone..

Alfred: What now!!?

Ron: You looking for your pills now too little guy!?

Alfred: Okay Ron.. you are like the biggest scumbag ever.. I don’t even—

Ron: You don’t have to “know where to begin” anywhere because you work for me now.. and this is what I had to go through in training as well..

Alfred: Oh fuck you.. fuck.. yo—

Ron and Jim hang up..

Ron: Yeah I don’t know if he’s gonna last..

Jim: It’s.. your call.. ass..

Jim blocks Ron, then tosses his phone into a remote stream..

Jim looks at the ground in confusion.. shaking his head..