(Genre: Creative Writing, (may you not take this personally) and as usual, thanks for reading, thanks for the support!),

Okay so,
As of now my interpretations of my emotions,
Tell me that,
I feel that;

Although however often I feel a need to provide examples,

I just do NOT want to continue keeping score,
Of the perpetual mean-spirited social energy attacks I feel to receive..,

I just do NOT want to keep holding myself back,
By constantly analyzing after the next person unexpectedly acts like a scumbag beyond words towards me..,

Why people change and operate the way they do feels out of my control,
And yet too often I feel unable to avoid it while frequently struggling to discover/rediscover and sustain increasing peaceful acceptance of it..,

For example,
If anyone has a problem with me,
I wish the person could just politely communicate it,
Instead of acting in some way that harms a needed interdependent team spirit,

For example,
It’s felt (and continues to feel) hard adjusting and readjusting,
to unexpectedly snarky,
sarcastic,
And/or any forms of provocative pointless egoic attention seeking dramatic bullshit..,

For example,
(And I’m sorry if this sounds dismissively judgmental),
HOWEVER;
I believe that,
In all groups of any kinds,
People are just as capable,
Of tragically developing into spiritually unconscious forces of evil,

Yet (for example),
Even if someone’s social/geographical environment gives them experiences that build them into the nastiest son of a scumbag imaginable,
Well,
I’ll just (once again..) try remembering to breathe,
Etc..,
Etc..,

Shit..,
I just get so angry at others who I feel (unconsciously) pointlessly deliberately provoke me while I feel unable to express how they add to my emotional painful frustration..,

The more someone tries to hurtfully provoke me in ways I can NOT describe,
The more likely the intense emotions might toxically build within me,
Unless I remember to practice just expecting them to be dickheads so I’m (as a result) less hurtfully let down,
And yes,
I feel a need to keep reminding myself to breathe (etc, etc, etc..),

I just don’t have time to precisely write and analyze every mean act my perceptions tell me is cruelly directed towards me,

Based on the way I presently often feel to see,
The world appears to be full of scumbags,
And regardless of the “love” several people claim to believe in,
Based on my perceptions,
Their actions,
Too often appear to speak differently,
unfortunately,

I’ll just keep trying to let the negativity pass through me,
Instead of it contaminating my perceptions excessively,

I’ll just keep trying to have my awareness come back and remain out of the forces of insecure,
sad,
angry hurtfulness..(for example),

And for example,
And although I’m not perfect either,
I’m not the deepest cause of others’ pain and insecurity,
I’m not the deepest cause of how someone has been psychologically/emotionally and/or however damaged throughout his life..,

I try having compassion and wishing others the best,
Yet there’s just so much,
That feels so deeply out of my control..,

It often feels as just..,
Another day,
Another obstacle..,

Another day,
Another dickhead trying to get to my head..,

Another day,
Another..
time to expect,
Feeling better,

And no matter who and/or however many others successfully drag me down,
My head will always try to..,
Remain..,

Up

(Genre: Creative Writing, (thanks for the continued support as for those of you who read these), and as always, please do NOT take these personally, thanks!)

Dear Bullies,
Because I feel these experiences and feelings again and again,
I’ll say it again,

Dear Bullies,
I did not cause your pain and misery,
Stop directing your anger towards me,

Dear Bullies,
If you sense weakness within me,
Such as anxiety and/or however I struggle socially,
Please don’t collectively intimidate me,
Don’t get sarcastic,
Don’t be a jerk..,
Because,
How will that teach me!?
And how will that help heal the source of your misery!?

Dear Bullies,
Why would I want to please someone who reprimands me with nothing to teach me!?

Dear Bullies,
Why would I be motivated to work harder for someone who frightens me!?

Dear Bullies,
If you were also bullied,
Why perpetuate the cycle onto innocent people such as me..!?

Dear Bullies,
I’m innocent,
And if there’s something you feel a need to tell me,
Just..,
Communicate yourself kindly and empathetically..,

Dear Bullies,
Instead of taking your rage out on me,
Let’s remember to understand and help each other feel better more perpetually,

I’m trying to let more and more go,
Yet sometimes certain people make stuff harder that results in an overall WORSE outcome for me,
Which therefore wouldn’t benefit in any way,
Mutually collectively..,

I’d guess that we can agree that I’m also not perfect and life can feel horrible,

Dear Bullies,
Just.. chill.. out

(Genre: Creative writing, and may you NOT take this personally, thanks as always for reading!)

Speaking pertaining to whoever and whatever;

Dear assholes,
Stop provoking me,
Just stop,
I did NOT cause your misfortunes,

Dear assholes,
Stop painfully provoking me,
In ways,
that you all know I struggle to put into words,

Dear assholes,
I try to show up and follow orders,
If you need something,
Just ask..,

Dear assholes,
If I was elsewhere,
Don’t blurt out an assumption in front of others to turn them against me,

Dear assholes,
If I’m trying to help,
Don’t crack hateful jokes,
and please do NOT get sarcastic collectively,

Don’t worry assholes,
I’ll get less butthurt eventually,

Once again,
I wish to clear all this shitass energy

(Genre: Creative Writing/A short play..(?).. and.. Please.. Do NOT take this Personally)

Person #1: I see what you’re doing.
Person #2: Which is..?
Person #1: You’re not doing me favors to make me happy, you’re doing me favors to feel power over me. You’re—
Person #2: Oh stop with the bullshit!!
Person #1: It’s not bullshit, you’re pressuring me to accept your “favors”.., not giving me a chance to say “no”.. you’re doing me favors that I didn’t ask for, that you know I struggle to return, which will give you an excuse for you to talk shit to me, making me feel as a “bad” person, in order to boost your ego.
Person #2: What the hell are you talking about!?
Person #1: Something that you can’t admit.
Person #2: Man just shut the fuck up..
Person #1: Yuh know.. I’m trying to take jokes, be less serious myself, yet I find it sad that we can’t all just chill out and remain balanced.. Why is there always drama!? Like how much attention do people need!!? And over what!!?
Person #2: Just shut up..
Person #1: Okay big G.
Person #2: Stop calling me that!!
Person #1: People call me shit all the time! Learn to take it!
Person #2: How!!?
Person #1: Fucking breathe. Notice your breath, whatever it is for you to be less egotistically hypersensitive!!

A fight breaks out, police are called, and then an investigation begins..

(Genre: CREATIVE WRITING/FICTION!!!! DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!)

(Posted to WordPress.com)

Behind these screens,
My guess is that these creators can laugh without feelings..(?),
My guess is that these creators love to confuse gullible idiots such as (how I however often view) myself to become put in a spot of collectively targeted stuff I did NOT cause..
man!!
Who, what, where, when, WHY.. and HOW!!?
Are the infinite webs of perpetual effects..!?

Bahhh…!?
What happens when I been snowboarding to the point of forgetting how to afford nourishment..(!?),
I guess I’ll be accused of being “full of shit” by another emotional displacement idiot!!?

I don’t know either at this moment,
Of past.. present.. future..

Whatever!!!!?

(Genre: First, Don’t take this personally, Second, it’s short fiction, dialogue, narration, I would guess..(?)..)

Person #1: Stop playin games.. you know I’m hypersensitive.. and then you’ll ask “what games” in order to frighten me into doing you more favors..
Person #2: Bruhhhhhhhh.. like.. what are you talking about..
Person #1: You tell me.. who’s bothering you know, you’re ex wife, the administration, withdrawal from masterbation..?
Person #2: What tha!!?
Person #1: Never mind.. just, go take your vow of manipulative stupidity without me..
Person #2: Hey!!!!!!

Person number two shoots person number one to steal his phone in order to sell all his WordPress.com blog posts for the new world order that the mass screens have brainwashed him to create..

(Do not take this personally..)

Sample #1:

Person #1: Yuh know.. back in my day we actually worked for a—
Person #2: And how will bragging about your stronger generation teach me..?
Person #1: Because you have zero appreciation..
Person #2: You didn’t answer my question..

Sample #2:

Person #1: Wow man you’re a good looking dude..!
Person #2: Don’t compliment me in order to make me feel I owe you.
Person #1: I mean I was just—
Person #2: Shut up.
Person #1: Man.. like.. what the fuck is up with you!?
Person #2: Well if I could climb up and dissipate the fuck I would.
Person #1: That’s it..
Person #2: What..?
Person #1: Get out!!
Person #2: How polite..
Person #1: Okay.. stop with games..
Person #2: Brilliant..

Disclaimer: It’s the title..

(Genre: Creative Writing/Language Arts/whatever else one wishes to label this as..)

(Please do NOT take this personally..),

Person #1: I told yuh..
Person #2: What..? That he was “bad” because you kept provoking him..?
Person #1: What are you talking about!?
Person #2: Your lack of self-awareness..
Person #1: Which is..?
Person #2: That you repeat the same damn shit over and over again in order to make others either believe you’re stupid or somehow incapable in order to receive special treatment..
Person #1: Wait what thuh—
Person #2: I don’t know either..

DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY: Just to guess..(?).., Basic logic; if someone (or however many) decides to intimidate whoever (and/or however many) on the job, the person, or people(s), becoming intimidated, will (I would guess..(?)) lose focus, and will have more and more trouble keeping the job, fulfilling tasks required, and will more likely screw up, increasing chances of resulting in a deadly chain reaction, if fulfilling the job is required for whoever’s mutual/interdependent survival. Therefore, (and as for the person (or people(s)).., intimidating others), whatever someone has been through, and/or is deeply pissed off about, should not be displacing his/her/their rage.. onto others who are trying to stay focused and do the morally correct thing.. My wish is that; as for whoever has accumulated unhealed forms of any types of trauma, is to just, get help however he/she/they views as MORALLY necessary such as WITHOUT adding harm to himself/herself/themself(s) and/or others.. As for myself, I guess I can say that there’s always some unpredictable frightening obstacle that can shock our senses.. therefore, stay safe, stop blaming others who you can NOT change, stop going around scaring others, just.. chill.. notice your breathing.. the internal sensations expanding and contracting.. I struggle as well, yet even if I’m “full of shit”, I guess that this once again comes down to the basic truism of needing to never quit.. 

I feel that,

Although I feel I’m accountable,
Lots of stuff just feels painfully out of my control,

It’s..,
Me feeling there to be constant social negativity,
That my emotional perceptions,
I often believe are telling me,
Including that,
Several will eventually prefer to avoid me,

The pain has accumulated,
And sometimes it really shocks me,

At times I do feel a victim mentality,
And I’d say there’s uncomfortable truths simultaneously,

I guess that sometimes various situations,
Tragically fall to hatred inevitably..?

What a sad reality..,

What forces of pain are really there to “teach” and/or “strengthen” me..?
Too often I’ve felt worse off from various forms and degrees of pain,
subsequently,

I guess the outcomes manifest unpredictably..?

And here I am once again,
With internal emotional intensity,
Just manifesting and passing,
As it however often,
deeply strikes me,

Yet may we hang in there,
Empathetically,

It’s just that I feel that..,
Sometimes (or however often),
There are storms..,
And I hope for clearness again,
As usual