Okay..,
As for the posts I have not deleted today on April 27th, 2023..,
As for OCD and number of posts..,
I’m now on number “670”..,
And of course was previously on number 669..,
It just was the six.. followed by the nine..,
Huhhhhhh..,
I know creative work is NOT about numbers but still..,
The OCD..,
(Obsessive Compulsive “Disorder”),
Just..,
Feels embarrassed too easily..,
It’s toxic perfection makes it’s self-consciousness more and more embarrassing since it gets so triggered by such ridiculous meanings..,
And as for it being a “disorder”,
Well..,
Even if in certain moments I fail to resist it..,
Still..,
I still feel it’s possible,
To find,
More and more peace with it,
It can remain as background noise,
Background inner sensations..,
And I can become better and better,
At,
Redirecting my attention,
So instead of focusing on pleasing the obsessive thinking,
I can try once again focusing on my breathing,
And I guess I can start with noticing an inhale and exhale..,
Inhale..,
Ahhhhhhh..,
And even if that was NOT clearly NOR properly explained..(?),
Well..,
I feel that I can once again inhale,
Then..,
Exhale
Ahhhhhhhhh
Zach Dana Writing 