Once Again in Isolation

I feel rejected constantly,
And I feel the only group that accepts me,
Still hurts me,

Such as criticizing me,
For feeling hurt,
In response to how they treat me,

Then wanting space from me,
Due to my exacerbated struggles,
Such as with paying attention,
And emotional hypersensitivity,
(Or hyper-reactivity (?)),

Of course,
many are nice to me,
Many have been often there for me,
I feel so many,
Including me,
Struggle to NOT hurt others,
While trying to honestly express how they feel,
To keep it real,

I feel,
The only type of group,
That’ll accept me,
Makes me feel bad,
For me being me,
Instead of empathizing,
Such as acknowledging,
That a reason for my exacerbated hypersensitivity,
And learning disabilities,
Is due to my bullying history,

Sometimes they’re their for me,
Yet other times,
They throw more damaging criticism at me,
Causing another spike,
In my,
Painful obsessive insecurity,

I try to hard,
To take stuff,

And I try to communicate myself so hard,
And I feel mant just keep dismissing me,
And (similar to what I said (?)),
When the anger,
Such as due to feeling and failing to let go of built up pain as a result of (regardless of their intentions) how they treat me,
explodes out of me,
They then powerfully,
Criticize me,
Invalidate or do whatever it may be to me, (Similar to what I believe a friend described to me (?)),
Instead of empathizing with my,
With my struggles,
With learning disabilities,
With hypersensitivity,

I feel that,
Their points are valid,
And so are mine,

As I also said(?),
I try so hard,
To chill,
When I be honest,
I feel,
Many try to shut me down,

I feel,
I listen respectfully,
When people keep it real,
With me,
Even the one time,
I try being honest with how I feel by ways they treat me,
I feel attacked,
And hurt,
Sometimes (if not frequently),

To be real,
I feel,
I respect often am there for them,
When they’re real to me,
Yet when I try to be real to them,
I often feel hurt,
My many of them,

I wish,
I felt,
Others understood more,
Of why,
Struggle the way I do,
To be real,

When many of them,
Decide to distance from me,
Due to struggles of mine (which I believe I reasonably mentioned (?)) socially,
The only friend I’m left with,
Who I’m always polite to,
After I try to keep it real,
By saying how I feel,
He tells me,
That I should NOT complain,
Because he treats me,
the way,
“everybody treats everybody”,
While dismissing what I tell him such as that,
I feel laughed at,
And due to my history and exacerbated hypersensitivity,
To small stuff,
I respond,

Then he lectures me,
Instead of empathizing me,
Unlike moments of empathy he had for me,

Then I’m left,
And feel betrayed,
And feel those I thought I could sufficiently trust,
Turned on me,
Yet again,
I wind up,
In isolation,
With painful insecurity,
With painful sensitivity,
With (what I feel as),
Harmful inner pain,
Harmful temptations on alleviation,
Such as being susceptible to dangerous addiction,

So I struggle,
To let go,
I struggle,
To be with,
To clear,
To heal,
Similar to past experiences,
That I’d say,
I very well,

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