Remains of Me

Speaking based on my present understanding if I’m accurately internally understanding myself:

And to (as always) speak for MYSELF:

Regardless of how feelings may (however predictably or unpredictably) tend to change and occur,
I feel,
Sometimes the memory (such as of someone hurting me) is most painful as it occurs (especially) when I’m by MYSELF,
And/or completely distant,
From those who ARE sufficiently empathetically there..,

Sometimes,
I feel,
When I’m ALONE with it,
I painfully sink deeper into it,

Sometimes and (of course, if not often),
I feel,
When I’m ALONE with it,
I’m more VULNERABLE,
To the pain immensely deepening,
Including IRRATIONAL handling of the pain that may be inwardly arising,

??

And I’d say,
I must regain focus,
On how I feel,
To reconnect,
However I see fit,
With the rational energy,
So the dark clouds LESS LIKELY,
Obliterate,
What remains of me,

And/or the remains,
Of the form I may ever be in,
Presently