Over Explanation Seeking

I wish I can just appreciate the moment,
Without ALWAYS being distracted by an obsessive urge to write everything down..,

I just want to appreciate the present,
Without feeling this painful obsessive need,
To constantly deeply analytically document,

Ohhh my mind just keeps me down,
My mind takes me out of the rest of my body,
My mind reduces my awareness to just unorganized over-thinking,
My mind makes me LESS aware,
My mind makes me MORE desperate,
My mind makes me MORE vulnerable,
More susceptible,
To harmful people,
Places and organizations,
(For example..),

Here and there I feel it’s important to share,
To organize,
Etc, etc..,
Yet I must realize,
I must..,
Recognize it,
To safely and healthily reduce it,
When I’m overdoing it,

I just must keep spotting it,
And maybe start expanding my attention of my breath(?),
Then my inner sensations..,
Or I must,
Expand my attention,
In ways that’ll (also) MORE likely reduce toxic over-thinking,
I must catch myself when spirling..,
Just need some peaceful helpful reminding..,

And/or to further emphasize..(?),
I feel that,
I must catch it,
“In the thick of it”,
Is that how they say it ?
Why must I overthink that..?

Why must I always have a deep explanation for everything..(?),
As opposed to,
Deepening my appreciating of my present experiencing..(?),
Why can’t I remind myself of the awesome fortune it is(?),
To just be,
Right here,
Right now,
In this good health,
As this elaborate human being,

(I’ll cite this Alan Watts excerpt again: https://youtu.be/mMRrCYPxD0I)

Just felt a need for APPRECIATING..,
And well..,
As I believe,
There’s always,
A clearer and clearer,
Deeper and deeper,
Concise and more concise,
Or whatever form(s) of conveying..,

In addition to not cutting out this stanza..,
I’ll remind myself again that:
As for creativity,
I must remind myself,
That the more my attention is consciously in the present,
The more expansive and therefore alert and aware my creative awareness is..,

The LESS I’m caught up in my mind,
The BROADER and MORE clearly alert my awareness is,
Such as,
Of whatever there is,
That is MORE than just,
My thoughts,
That is MORE than just,
My mind..,

I believe there’s always going to be something new,
Always a deeper view,
Expanding inner peaceful power in the present,
Is what I feel I must continue,
To try my best to do,

And even though it’s NOT easy,
I’d say that overall,
It may just,
MORE likely be,
Better for me


(Source: (something (I presently feel to be) always worth watching again and again whenever we can https://youtu.be/uNyhYTVZu0w)

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