Never Expected

As I like to say,
Which is that I feel there is infinitely more than words can say,
To express how appreciative I feel,
To have those such as you throughout my life,
And seeing you develop and work on yourself so much more and deeper than so many others I’ve seen,
Thank you,
For being among the few in this world,
Who are kind,
And know how to sincerely yet properly help whenever I may be emotionally struggling,
(Or however I’m painfully excessively grappling),

Of course,
I’d say there’s certainly been times when I’ve been extremely hard to be around,
And I’m glad you have stayed strong (when I was clearly NOT) and still kindly stuck around..,

And well,
Even though my history of having learning and emotional atypical adversity,
Having got bullied by others among whatever else may still weigh in me,
Of course,
I’m still deeply glad that unlike so damn many,
You remain kind and patient with me,
I feel that you have an ability that so many others have NOT been able to attain NOR sustain the way you have,
So I feel it’s better than any set of fancy words can describe to also have you around,

And well,
Not to get too personal,
But I just wanted to give a giant “fuck you”,
Those in power,
Who use their awareness of detail to fool us into thinking that they “know the answer”,
I’m glad that we (yet especially you) can strongly and courageously spot bullshit,
Such as those who may try and manipulate us by talking about truth while uncontrollably insatiably feeding their own unconscious narcissism,

Maybe while meditating,
Instead of deepening awareness of inner body sensations including consciously noticing thoughts that pass by,
They may be thinking,
“Wow, how spiritual am I!?”

Fuck them,
UNLIKE them,
Not only have greatly reminded me what I also see to be true,
Yet unlike certain monastic narcissists,
UNLIKE the spiritual frauds that may exist,
Unlike whoever is full of shit because of whatever I just do NOT presently have compassion for..,
I’m glad that you NOT ONLY talk about and practice what I feel as true,
You also greatly embody it,

And just to throw it out there,
I feel that there are true good ones in whatever may be our spiritual path..,
Or whoever it is and whatever they may try to teach us..,

And I am so amazed and impressed at how much you have worked on and truly developed yourself,
And even though we may have had intense altercations when we were younger,
(And maybe occasionally recently.. one I won’t mention..),
I never expected how much I’d come to admire,
My younger brother

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